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Monthly Archives: September 2009

Click Go The Shears

Click go the shears boys, click, click, click,
Wide is his blow and his hands move quick,
The ringer looks around and is beaten by a blow,
And curses the old snagger with the bare-bellied joe.

Out on the board the old shearer stands,
Grasping his shears in his thin bony hands
Fixed is his gaze on a bare-bellied joe,
Glory if he gets her, won’t he make the ringer go.

Click go the shears boys, click, click, click,
Wide is his blow and his hands move quick,
The ringer looks around and is beaten by a blow,
And curses the old snagger with the bare-bellied joe.

In the middle of the floor in his cane bottomed chair
Sits the boss of the board with his eyes everywhere,
Notes well each fleece as it comes to the screen,
Paying strict attention that it’s taken off clean.

Click go the shears boys, click, click, click,
Wide is his blow and his hands move quick,
The ringer looks around and is beaten by a blow,
And curses the old snagger with the bare-bellied joe.

The colonial experience man, he is there of course,
With his shiny legging’s on, just got off his horse,
Gazes all around him like a real connoisseur,
Scented soap and brilliantine and smelling like a whore.

Click go the shears boys, click, click, click,
Wide is his blow and his hands move quick,
The ringer looks around and is beaten by a blow,
And curses the old snagger with the bare-bellied joe.

The tar-boy is there waiting in demand
With his blackened tar-pot in his tarry hand,
Spies one old sheep with a cut upon its back
Hears what he’s waiting for it’s “Tar here Jack”

Click go the shears boys, click, click, click,
Wide is his blow and his hands move quick,
The ringer looks around and is beaten by a blow,
And curses the old snagger with the bare-bellied joe.

Now the shearing is all over, we’ve all got our cheques,
So roll up your swags and it’s off down the trace,
The first pub we come to it’s there we’ll have a spree,
And everyone that comes along it’s ‘Have a drink on me.’

Click go the shears boys, click, click, click,
Wide is his blow and his hands move quick,
The ringer looks around and is beaten by a blow,
And curses the old snagger with the bare-bellied joe.

There we leave him standing shouting for all hands,
Whilst all around him every ‘shouter’ stands,
His eye is on the keg which now is lowering fast,
He works hard, he drinks hard, and goes to Hell at last

Click go the shears boys, click, click, click,
Wide is his blow and his hands move quick,
The ringer looks around and is beaten by a blow,
And curses the old snagger with the bare-bellied joe

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Posted by on September 14, 2009 in Entertainment

 

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Along The Road To Gundagai

Along The Road To Gundagai
by Jack O’Hagan (1922)

There’s a track winding back
to an old-fashioned shack,
Along the road to Gundagai.

Where the gum trees are growin’
and the Murrumbidgee’s flowin’
beneath the starry sky.

Oh my mother and daddy are waitin’ for me
And the pals of my childhood once more I will see
And no more will I roam ‘cos I’m headin’ right for home
Along the road to Gundagai.

Australiana at its best – Mum and Dad would never stop into the Dog on the Tuckerbox.

 
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Posted by on September 14, 2009 in Entertainment

 

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Days by the Ocean

Days by the Ocean
by Raymond J. Bartholomeuz (1986)

In the steammy, sensual rivercave of my mind
I stumble, I stagger, I stammer
Like some crazy South Korean circus clown
Lost, lonely, lifeless, laconically lazy
Marooned, marooned
I’m on a lagoon
I am an island
I am an isthmus
I come from Bermuda
I don’t believe in christmas
look out oh sinister holy man
look out oh righteous Bolshevik
I care no longer for your petty problems
I make my own decisions now
Today I laugh, I joke, I chitter chatter chitter
But tomorrow, tomorrow I go to Phillip Island

Everytime I hear this poem my first memory is of my brother absolutely cacking himself to the point I thought he would mess his pants. Then it just got funnier when the young kid when on and did a cracking rendition of it himself. Hands down the funniest piece of Australian poetry I’ve every heard. Man I miss Hey Hey It’s Saturday.

 
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Posted by on September 14, 2009 in Entertainment, Family, Relaxation

 

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